My 17 year old has lost his flipping mind. Now, I'm not necessarily saying that there's no way I could have birthed this child. I've been known to teeter on the edge of sanity. Okay, I've been known to thrive there.
He came home from football practice, showered, and was off to a mandatory meeting at the nursing home where he works. While he was gone, I watched election updates, though I wasn't paying much attention.
He bursted through the front door rambling about biblical prophecies, Nostradomas, Muslim leaders, the end of the world, the Mayan calendar, and building a bunker.
"What in the bloody hell are you talking about?" I asked him.
He explained how this theory matched up with this one, and how the bible told him so, and oh my gosh, I was ready to find a sedative for him after he sat down at the computer and started looking things up. "If Obama is elected, we're all going to die. It's the end of the world, I'm telling ya. Just you wait and see. It says so right here."
"I read it on the internet. It must be true!" I told him.
I suggested that he get a grip and simmer himself down. He's known to work himself into quite a frenzy. No, I've no clue where he gets that. Nope. Not a one.
Last night, at 11, when they projected Obama the president elect, I nudged the youngest child from his sleep and told him. Then I went to the eldest child's room and tapped his leg until I roused him.
"History was just made," I told him. "Obama is president."
"Nu-uh. No way. You're lying," he replied.
"No, really," I told him and went back to bed myself.
I'd just settled in under the covers when I heard what sounded like gun shots. It wasn't, but someone around the corner was setting off one hell of a firework display. This didn't set well with the dog, and I must admit that my heart raced a bit because I did think it sounded like someone had been shot before I realized it was merely my neighbors celebrating. Idiots.
I must say I was unsettled. Though I had a bit of a hard time picking what I considered the lesser of two evils in this election, I had to wonder what was going to happen next. The loud noise ringing out into the night frazzled my nerves a bit, and I had a hard time drifting off to sleep.
"We're all dead," my son told me this morning as he surfed the web looking for more theories and predictions. It didn't matter what I told him, he's convinced the signs are there. I'm not sure which signs he's talking about, but he tells me they are there.
I gave up trying to calm him down. Instead, I started singing some R.E.M.
"It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine...."
After all, singing always seemed to calm him when he was a wee one.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Crazy Kids, Crazy Neighbors, Crazy Mothers
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4 comments:
Umm...wow. I laughed, I was concerned, and my eyebrow raised slightly. Tell your boy, while I am divided (see my latest post) over what has taken place (happy that this country has finally gotten over itself, concerned about Obama's lack of experience), I hope all these naysayers and doom predicters, give the guy a chance. But all around a very humorous post (and probably typical of most republican, including my in-laws) homes last night around 11 PM.
Not only am I the only chick in this household, but also the only Democrat.
You might remind him that it is Bush who believes in the Apocalypse and has been doing his part in furthering the so-called prophecies.
You could also remind him that the end of the world has been predicted by people since the beginning of time and failed every single time. Literally from 2 days after Jesus supposedly died to 100AD, 600AD, 1000AD, 2000AD, ad nauseum.
Hell, when I used to actually believe and go to church I saw a guy who predicted, through his "well researched" scripture, that the world was going to end sometime around 1997. This was in 1986 or so and even though I was about 17 I was able to debunk his statement in under 30 seconds by using 1 verse that came after one he quoted. He quoted the part about how "the lord will come like a thief in the night" but completely missed the line that came right after it..."he will come when all the naysayers are saying 'Where is your Jesus now?'" Since most of the predictions at the time were that 2000 was gonna be "it", I saw no reason for everyone to say that before that time.(Where IS your Jesus now?..sorry hadda be done)
Even my most religious of friends saw I was right and lo and behold, the world hasn't ended.
You might also hint to him that someone you know(that's me) was pretty much just schizophrenic when I believed all that hogwash that religion fills you with and that once I stopped listening to the nonsense, I no longer had voices telling me the world was going to end. Seriously, it was my voice but you can only hear something so many times before you start to repeat it, potentially without your conscious mind's consent.
OR, just tell him about the Yahweh UFO dude that claims he can make a flying saucer appear just by wishing it into existence. I'm sure he's still got video online.
I think I do remember the world supposedly coming to end back when I was in either 7th or 8th grade. So 82ish, I think.
He says Revelations makes some mention to a Muslim ruling the free world for 3 1/2 years. I don't know. I haven't bothered to look up his theories, even for the entertainment value.
I did tell him if he used an ounce of his intellect, he would see how foolish it all was. He said I won't be saying that when I'm wrong. heh
I'm sure he'll find something new to obsess over before much longer.
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